I am not a runner. By any means. But the other night, I felt like running... and then I didn't. This evening, I had the same urge. The only problem is that my night was busy until about 8:30. But when that time rolled around, I drove home, ran up to my bedroom, threw on my sweats, and was out the door.

I can't really describe it, but this feeling of urgency is inside of me and I feel like if I don't go run a mile, I might burst. So I did. I drove up to the local high school, where at least 2 different events were going on, and I circled the parking lot for a spot. Once I found one, I locked up, grabbed my ear phones, and headed to the track which was situated in the dark of the night.

I started to run. Lap 1 felt great. Lap 2 felt even better. Every gulp of air was fresh. Lap 3 started to wear me down, and by Lap 4, I was starting to tire. I called it quits at a mile and huffed and puffed to my car. My time was not anything to be proud of; in fact, I was mildly disappointed. But in the end, my goal was accomplished: I ran.

Like I said, I am no runner. It is not something I do on a regular basis. However, on nights like tonight, I become a different person with this spirit of energy and there is no stopping me!

Other than my run session tonight, I will report that my life lately has been pretty normal. Kristi and I helped celebrate Holidazzle this weekend by having our doors open Friday night and Saturday during the day. It was nice to get some visitors! I love the small-town feel that this event gives our town, and it makes me feel warm inside when our community gets together like this to celebrate the upcoming holidays.

I feel like I have slowed down from "very busy" to just "busy." This is great news!

My favorite day lately has been Sunday, for many reasons. Every once in awhile, when I'm scheduled, I get to go to the jail early in the morning and help lead women's church. I am also a part of an adult Sunday school class during morning service, in which we are currently learning about our spiritual gifts. Then comes lunch and fellowship. I always forget, and then am pleasantly surprised when I remember that we now sing in front of the church before afternoon service. It's mostly for the younger kids but anyone is welcome, so I always stand up and sing! I love love love it.

After church, I usually catch up on work around the house, read a book, work on projects, or just relax. My parents and I almost always grab dinner together, or we go out w/the family, and then we usually rent a movie. Last night, we watched Legendary. It was about a boy who gets into wrestling and through it, draws his family back together. Sounds sentimental, I know, but it was actually really good and had a very good plot. The cover read, "Is more inspirational than 'The Blind Side!" I don't know if I'd go that far, but it was good.

I have also been really into reading lately. I love to read. My favorite author right now is Jodi Picoult. She is not a Christian author but writes about very interesting things-- mostly controversial issues. She really gets you thinking. I don't always agree w/what is said but she does a good job of writing from a lot of different perspective and viewpoints, and on top of which, she's just a really intriguing and interesting writer. I have had trouble reading anything other than Jodi Picoult lately, but my book consultant (my friend's mom who lets me borrow all her books!) recently gave me some other books, so I am taking a break and reading "The Christmas Box."

Well... I should wrap it up before I keep babbling on. Speaking of wraps, I had an Aisia Chicken Crunchy Wrap tonight for dinner, but it's just not cutting it after that run so I might need to go make a smoothie before work. I best be off! Love you all!

T

That phrase has often repeated over and over in my mind. I can hear her speaking the words, and every time I do, I realize I have lost even more time.

I have been feeling rather old lately. I know that when I put it all into perspective, I am really not that old. Whenever I make this proclamation, those in their 30s, 40s, and 50s quickly tell me, "You're still SO young!"

But that's what they told me 3 years ago.

How long until I don't qualify for that category anymore?

The other night, I was talking to my mom about my upcoming birthday.

"I'll be 25," I told her.

"No you will not," she replied, "You're going to be 24."

"Actually, I'm going to be 25," I told her again.

I could see the calculations going on her head. Needless to say, I most likely inherited my math skills (or lack thereof) from her. She finally agreed with me. By then, I had already reminded myself that this puts me at a quarter-of-a-century in age.

Sometimes I feel like I am trapped inside of an hour glass, staring out at everyone else around me. For others, time seems to march right on in logical order. Friends get married, have children, move on. Parents age, nieces & nephews grow taller and try out for basketball. And I stand inside the glass, watching it all go on, seemingly trapped in my life that stays still. Day in and day out, I change not, while everyone else marches on to the appropriate part of their life.

Perhaps those thoughts are just an eloquent way of justifying why my life did not necessarily pan out the exact way that I had planned. Yet I am blessed beyond measure all the same. Or maybe the time that passes just gets me panicked. No one lives forever. Every year changes a person.

I was looking through old photo albums recently. Oh, have times changed, and will continue to change.

I found myself looking at pictures of my parents in their youth. Back when I was 4 years old, they were in their mid thirties. The same age group that my older siblings are now in. I found myself staring at my sister wearing a then-trendy 80's outfit, and suddenly I was asking the question out loud, "Are we going to look back at the clothes we wear now and think we looked good?"

I didn't want to hear the answer.

But that's part of what time does.

My friend was telling me about someone who took a picture of himself every day in the same position for a year. When looking at all the pictures next to each other, you could see an evident process of aging over that year. Probably not a notable difference to just anyone who sees someone frequently, but in small, comparable increments the change was noticeable.

We are all aging whether we like it or not. In fact, by the time you get through this post, you will be just a bit older. (Perhaps just as much due to the fact that I'm wordy and this post is longer than it needs to be, in addition to the inevitable process of time).

My comfort in all of this analysis is that fortunately, my trust lies in the One who never does change. I can go from 2 to 25 to 100, and God is still the same.

Thankfully, no matter how much time and age changes a person, it will never change God. His promises will endure, and His Word is always Truth. He is faithful to the end. Over time, God gives life, and He takes it away.

And in His time, He unfolds the best.

I read this quote in one of my bible study books the other day, and really loved it:

"God may not move according to our schedule, but He is right on time for what is best."

Love you all! T