There is a lot on my mind tonight... and to write a deep blog post at this point would be dangerous.

Very dangerous.

So I shall tread in safer waters... for now.

First, my picture.


Those are my nieces. They are beautiful and I love them. From L-R:
Lola Mae: The blonde beauty with a soft heart.
Naomi Tasha: Spunky & sweet.
Sophia Richelle: We call her the "diva." She can dance better than me!
Tillie Sue: Energetic and smart and a candy-holic.
Sylvia Ann: 2 (or 3 now??) going on 20.

Anyway, there you have it-- the female representation in Kaiser grandchildren so far. Time will only tell how many I will contribute!

Onto other things...

Lately:

1) I have developed an extreme dislike of high fructose corn syrup. While I have decided not to take a vegetarian lifestyle, I have definitely added it into my eating habits as much as possible, and with that comes a lot of other education concerning my aspiring "health-nut" status. Which includes all of the anti-sugar articles about how white sugar may as well be a drug. And even worse: high fructose corn syrup, which can be found in pretty much everything we eat that is packaged or processed, but the obvious culprits would be soda & candy.

Anyway, I know that coming from me, this may be shocking, especially considering that my motto has always been "Always save room for dessert." I am not against a dessert here and there (or a Starbucks frapp, especially when I have earned my 15th star and get a free one!), but I just feel it should be eaten in moderation. Furthermore, a lot of the products we think may be "healthy" are actually not healthy. And if you're going to enjoy something sweet, at least make sure it's the real deal-- made with REAL sugar.  It's not ideal, but it's better than the alternative (the deadly HFCS!) Or, a sliced peach or banana + peanut butter can do the trick, and it's a much healthier snack! (Another trick is using a healthy sweetener-- like honey. Goes delicious with a lot of things!)

P.S. This has only solidified further my 5-years-running soap box on my dislike of diet soda!!! (Sorry to all my diet-drinking friends...) (It also may be noted that I do have some cans of Pepsi underneath my sink and I drink one from time to time with my popcorn. HOWEVER, it is Pepsi Throwback... made with real sugar :)

2) I consume wayyyyy too much popcorn. BUT. A healthy way to enjoy this snack (and thus it is justified in my mind):

*I use organic white popping kernels from King Farms.

*I make it over the stove top with neutral-tasting coconut oil. (I have since learned that extra virgin olive oil is best enjoyed at room temperature for full health benefits, and it oxidizes at temperatures needed to cook popcorn in it, so coconut oil is a healthier choice because it can withstand higher temperatures!)

*I season it with sea salt.

TOTALLY justifies eating a ginormous bucket of it every single night.

....Right?

3) Enough on food... I went bowling tonight and scored a 99. There is a reason I never joined a bowling league... although my childhood best friend's dad owned a bowling alley... I guess it didn't really ever pay off.

4) Lily, my cat, found my sock puppet stuffed animal and removed her from my book shelf. I find it laying around in random places in my house. She likes to attack it when she's in a playful mood, or she just carries it around in her mouth.

She is also quite the hunter. She spots every single bug that gets into my house and even leaps into the air (she is a VERY good jumper!) and catches them. She swats them to the ground and bats them around until they die.

She also caught a mouse from our studio basement a month or so ago. It was so gross.

Meanwhile, my house will be rodent and insect-free as long as she is around!

5) I should go to bed.

Love you all!

T

A few months ago, Kristi approached me about meeting with some well-known photographers in the area. She was nervous.

"I can't imagine getting in contact with them," she told me. "Why would they want to meet with us?"

Her anxiety was apparent. But we wanted to do it, because we thought they could be a tremendous help to us and our business.

They are extremely successful photographers in their business. While they are a couple I have always known about and admired, I hadn't looked up to them as long as Kristi had. To her, meeting them would be like a young college basketball player meeting Michael Jordan.

She took the first step in getting in touch with them.

A couple of weeks later, we met and had lunch with a wedding planner. She was a huge encouragement in our life, and she suggested that we also meet with this couple.

However, we had heard nothing.

And often, silence can be interpreted as a "Leave me alone," or "No," or "I'm too busy to reply." We often jump to negative conclusions when there is no response.

"Do I dare contact them again?"

I told her, Yes.

She did, and we heard back from the husband of their team, almost immediately. As it turned out, they had not received our initial message.

Kristi and him started exchanging messages and planned to get together. However, he was in the middle of a busy time, and said he would get in touch when it slowed down a bit.

That happened to be 2 months later. Not a big deal, but it was a bit of a wait. Yet, we had no idea how the Lord used that timetable in His perfect way.

On a warm summer morning, Kristi and I stepped into Thirty-Thirty Coffee in Peoria and ordered drinks. We sat at a table, and pretty soon, he arrived.

I thought it would just be him. But she came, too.

He was tall and scruffy, friendly & warm. She was quiet and beautiful and captivating.

It is funny, meeting with people that you have never met, for the first time. Our intent was to get professional business advice from them-- how did they work together? How did they create such a successful business?

So we started off with the talking. Kristi looked to me, as I am usually the one to give the synopsis on "our story."

I gave a brief and somewhat surface story of our business history. It was meager at best; trite, at worst.

After my little performance, he looked to her and said, "Do you want to start?"

This is when it got good.

It was, like I later told Kristi, as if God sent them as angels to us. For such a time as this, He knew what we needed.

The next 2-3 hours were spent talking about God. She told us their story. Their success, their struggles, their sadness, their celebrations. She was vulnerable, and honest, and lovely. She did not sugar coat, but she told us the truth in love.

She told us about the "glacier." When we see a glacier, we see the 10% that sticks out of the water. What we don't see is the 90% underneath. Most people live their lives in the10%-- which is what most people see. Yet the 90% is neglected... even though it is the most important part. Because without the foundation, the inner workings, the thoughts and feelings and values and beliefs of that 90%-- there would be no 10%. Yet the 10% is all we ever let anyone see.

She told us about asking honest questions. What makes me sad? What makes me angry? What makes me nervous? What does God say about these feelings?

She told us how her and husband allowed their business to take over their lives. They exchanged good family life, a meaningful marriage, friends, and faith for a successful business. To others, the 10% looked good. But for them and their personal lives, the 90% was neglected.

She told us to be real. To be honest. To be open... to examine what God has done, why He has brought us here, and what He wants us to do.

Kristi sobbed. I sat quietly.

He was a lot like me, emotionally. She was a lot like Kristi, in terms of personality. It was so important to hear their story and see how God brought them through it.

She suggested reading a book, called, "I Quit."

At the end, we all held hands and they prayed for us.

It was like a miniature missions trip... in the middle of a coffee store. Neither Kristi nor I wanted to leave, for fear the joy of the Lord that had been in that place on that morning would leave us.

Kristi immediately bought the book and read it quickly. It helped bring a lot to light. She told me I would benefit from it greatly, and she ordered a copy for me. I read it, and loved it.

The premise of the book is to "quit" living life in such a way that is harmful. Quit being afraid of what others think. Quit lying. Quit dying to the wrong things. Quit denying anger, sadness, and fear. Quit blaming. Quit overfunctioning. Quit faulty thinking.

And quit living someone else's life.

There is no such thing as two people who are the same. In fact, even similar people are often quite different from one another. Which makes those that are different to begin with that much more separate. Kristi and I have learned that... in some ways... the hard way.

Because of differences and because life is so hard, we tend to adopt habits and ways of thinking that are unhealthy. They are defense mechanisms; they are crippling; and they will eventually kill our soul. This book helps to identify those areas and to show us that we can QUIT them.

And in quitting, we become free.

Free to be ourselves. Free to be who God made us to be. Free to rediscover who that person is, and live life in that way.

It is a book I would highly recommend to anyone, because even if you get through life pretty good, I guarantee there are a couple of areas in which every person needs to "quit."

This has been an interesting journey and I cannot wait to see how God continues to show me how to quit the bad and to continue the good.

Love you all!

T

Before we begin:  I want to start including a picture with each post. Even if it's just something low-key and totally non-related. Today's image is of my car. For those of you who only know my car as "Green T Bug," you might not be able to spot me over the next couple of months!

Green T Bug now has town spirit! Introducing my green beetle... with some new plates! YEA Morton P Fest 2012



I changed my blog template again.

Right, I know.

This time, though, I think I have it close to what I have been wanting.

Despite my vintage-shabby chic-texture-colorful nature, it always seemed clutter-some to apply this style to a blog. Thus, the unrest.

I think what I envisioned but never really settled on was a simpler, cleaner, look.

Which is what this is! So cross your fingers, and hopefully this setup is here to stay (for awhile.)

In other news, I am on a budget. I don't like it... but I'm doing it. It's good for me.

Today, I bought groceries at Aldi. I wasn't sure what the result would be, but here are some notes from my experience:

1) The whole time, I felt like I was in another country (or at least the minority. Nothing like shopping at Kroger in Morton!)

2) Nothing was organized in a logical order (which didn't bother me... I like to be surprised.)

3) There were less choices. (Which was perfect for someone like me, because the more choices, the longer it takes. If I only get 2 choices, then my decision becomes much easier!)

4) There was a long aisle at the end of the checkout process to bag my own groceries (another thing I did not mind.) Also, you pay a quarter to use a cart, but when you return your cart, you get your quarter back (this should help stop my habit of stealing shopping carts.)

5) My bill was 25% cheaper than I usually pay (which is great when on a budget!)

I will be returning to Aldi.

Some of you may be wondering about how my "Eat Your Veggies" diet is going. To be honest, I felt GREAT on it, but I know that I was not getting enough protein. There were days that I got waves of dizziness or just felt hungry ALL the time. I think the Hallelujah diet is definitely legit and works if you can do it full-fledged. But to apply it to your entire diet is difficult, and without being able to do that, someone like me is left... hungry.

I also believe, after doing my research, that raw fruits & vegetables are the best way to eat them. I believe that there are different sources of protein, and raw vegetables is your best source to obtain usable protein and the nutrients you need. I also believe that other sources of protein are not as beneficial, especially meat.

So with all that being said, I am still trying to eat healthy and incorporate as many raw veggies into my diet as possible... but I still eat veggie scrambles with eggs, cooked vegetable & meat meals, yogurt with fruit, cereal with milk, etc... I have found that I can be healthy without having to completely adhere to the codes of the diet.

Still taking my barley twice a day when I can, drinking delicious fruit & veggie smoothies, chomping on my big raw carrots, drinking green tea, and trying to avoid tons of high fructose corn syrup or heavily processed foods. So this search for health has definitely enacted some smart eating choices into my lifestyle :)

Another snack choice I have tweaked-- I was misinformed about the benefits of Extra Virgin Olive Oil. While it IS an excellent choice and so healthy for you, it is not so when you heat it (is best enjoyed at room temperature for full nutritional benefit), so my popcorn theory of being healthy was shot to the ground. Until I learned of coconut oil! It tastes just as delicious on popcorn, and is still great for you when heated up to cook the popcorn. You can even purchase in a "neutral" flavor if you don't care for the coconut taste.

One more thought, then I'll be done. I started reading the blog of one of my older friends who is traveling to Australia, and suddenly I wanted to travel to another country. Every once in awhile, I get the spark to want to go somewhere. After reading of her first day there, it made me itch to go discover someplace else. Top on my list is India, but at this point, I'd be happy traveling just about anywhere if it was new. We'll see what the Lord has in store over the next couple years... maybe another overseas trip... which I would LOVE!

So, there we have it. Another update from me... I'll try to be back sooner this time.

T

I need to update more often.

This, I know.

My problem is-- I always see it as such an ordeal. Not that I don't LOVE it but sometimes I don't realize that saying anything at all is better than nothing, so why wait until I feel inspired to write a novel?

Not everyone wants a novel.

Anyway.

I'm not sure what sparked it, but last weekend I started researching the Hallelujah Diet (can be found here http://www.hacres.com/hallelujah-diet/).

Don't freak out-- I'm not becoming a vegan. I have always said that there is no way I could do that.

HOWEVER.

I have always seen merit in this way of eating, especially since my Dad became so ill several years back. He adopted this diet and by juicing & eating healthier, he reversed effects that were supposed to be terminal.

If you read about how we SHOULD be eating as humans-- the way God designed us to eat-- it makes sense. He put fruit & vegetables on this Earth for us to enjoy, and it's really what our bodies are designed to digest. Raw fruits and veggies are packed with so many nutrients that our bodies need.

Anyway, I'm not going to stay on my soap box for long, because I've only been doing this for a few days. And I'm not really making a big commitment to it on purpose. I don't want to do something full-fledged only to give up a week later because it's "too hard." I simply want to try to work it into my already-busy lifestyle and see if I can make it fit. So far, I have really liked it and I truly feel great on it.

Last Sunday, I went to my mom's because she has a Vitamix (powerful blender!!). It can make smoothies or juice out of fruits and vegetables. I made a bunch of fun variations for the week. My goal is to eat as raw as possible for the first 2-3 meals of my day, then a big green leafy vegetable salad at night.

My favorite frozen juice combo is straight-up freshly squeeze grapefruit and orange juice. As it melts, it's a DELICIOUS and refreshing drink for a mid-morning snack. I also made one that includes broccoli, kale, carrots, pineapple, strawberries, apple, flax seed, and honey. Something about this combination is so sweet and yummy! You would never guess there are veggies in it.

I also put together a granola mix made of oatmeal, chocolate chips, craisins, flax seed, whole grain cereal, peanuts, sunflower seeds, peanut butter, and honey... and oh my word... it's AMAZING. A yummy sweet snack to eat throughout the day!

However, with that being said, I'm not strictly doing this. Like I said, I want to make this realistic, and if it can't be realistic than I know it won't happen.

So if I have a meeting with someone at Starbucks-- I'll probably still get a Frapp, or if I go out to dinner with my family, I'll order something yummy. Hopefully in eating this way, I'll naturally WANT to make healthier choices, but I'm not going to be crazy about it.

I also began taking barley pills twice a day (thanks to my Dad!!) and drinking a very natural, energy-supplying red green tea that my mom started selling. Those things paired with this "clean" way to eat has made me feel really good! It is a little tricky, because I am SUCH a protein fanatic, eating enough to keep me feeling full. However, I have found that as long as I keep filling up on this nutrient-rich food, I haven't needed as much protein from meats, eggs, or other sources. According to this diet, all the protein you need is in vegetables.

So, there you have it.

We'll see how it goes-- I'll be back soon to update!

Love you all, T

For the first few months (and even now, sometimes) the most dreaded question for me was, "So, how are you liking your new house?"

I think it's kind and lovely people want to know... However, I might be extra sensitive is because I am so busy that a lot of times, I haven't even been able to enjoy it. I come home, and instead of thinking about having a social life, a pile of laundry and dirty dishes are waiting for me.

Now, that's not my life ALL the time, but when I'm busy at work, it makes the rest of my life even busier. Additionally, as much as I love my 3rd shift job, I am SUCH a night owl and that's when I get stuff done. So my options are 1) stay up in the morning and get things done or 2) go back to sleep when I return from 3rd shift. And you better believe I almost always taken option #2.

Anyway, I'm done complaining. Here are some things I have immensely enjoyed since moving out... because, well, I can do whatever I want now :)

1) Eating popcorn in bed.
(OK, I may have done this at home, too... but I doubt my mom appreciated it.)
It is not uncommon to find little popcorn kernels under my bed.

2) Leave the house... with my bed unmade.
This actually almost kills me. I think it's because I grew up ALWAYS making my bed, and it was not acceptable to not do it. So it's just ingrained in my head. But sometimes, I'm running super late and I just can't get to it. So I leave it :)

3) Eat oatmeal or cereal for dinner.
Lame, I know. But sometimes it just sounds good and so that's what I eat :)

4) Clean my house... whenever I want!
Sometimes, it happens every week, just the way I like it.
But there are times that I have been super busy and I let things go... and really, instead of coming home and worrying about it, I crash on the couch and ignore the mess that surrounds me. No big deal.

5) Sleep with my cat.
Lily sleeps in my bed every night... yes, she is a bit spoiled. She even brings her toys into my bed and plays with them while I'm trying to sleep. But it is so sweet when she is curled up and purring beside me... I know she's just a cat, but it does help me feel less lonely and more safe.

So those are just a few things that I have been enjoying since living on my own. Trust me, moving out definitely reminded me of everything I DIDN'T do or worry about while still living with my parents... my mom spoiled me :) But it is great to have the responsibility and make decisions, even if they are little, on my own. As stressful and busy as it can be, it's worth it.

Love you all-- be back soon!

T

Well, I promised I would be back... so here I am.

Recently, I read one of my earlier posts (from 2006... when I was in college) and I was startled at how much I have changed. Obviously, I have grown older and matured, but also, I found myself laughing.

I laughed because I used to be so much more open and candid. I wasn't afraid to write about much of anything. I was so real and out there... and these days...

I find I am more guarded.

Right or wrong, it's just the way it is, and I found it to be an interesting observation.

Maybe I psycho-analyze too much, but at any rate, I want it to be a goal of mine to be genuine, always.

So lately, I have found the supernatural joy of the Lord being infused back into my life. For this, I am thankful. I went through a recent valley lately. I'm not sure what caused it or why it was there, but with a little bit of work (because climbing up a mountain from the bottom isn't always easy) I am finding that I am on my way back up. Part of me is enjoying the climb, because I know that once I reach the top... although it is a BEAUTIFUL view, the only place to go is down, unless I can sustain my spot of mountaintop awesomeness.

And with God's good grace and help, I can. So, I continue to envelope myself with the joy of Jesus and let that be the driving force to get me through each and every day. After all, that's all I can rely on, anyway. To rely on anything else usually results in disaster, eventually.

I am encouraged that everything I read right now, whether it be in devotions, Jesus Calling, or as a topic of a bible study, is exactly what I need. God has a beautiful way of giving us what we need, when we need it, as long as we are willing to receive.

Anyway, I am excited to continue on in my journey and see what good things God continues to provide in my life.

IA has been... stressful, to say the least. But good. And getting better. We are on the uphill swing, I would say. We went through a tough time recently of "defining and redefining" who we were and what we wanted to be, but now that we have that figured out, it just takes courage, perseverance, and wisdom to keep things rolling. Every time it gets tough, I always view our business as a gift from God and my working relationship with Kristi as a marriage-- we made a vow of "commitment" and even when it gets tough, that's not excuse to give up. God brought it all together for a reason and blessed it with success, and there's a reason for it. At times, I do wonder what God was thinking when He put Kristi and I together because we couldn't be any more different, but somehow, by His grace, we've gotten this far. And I always think... if we have gotten THIS far, then we can get through anything.

Home life has been... lacking. That sounds terrible, but I feel like I'm hardly home. Except on the weekends, which are spent cleaning or organizing or paying bills or buying groceries or just CRASHING on the couch with my popcorn and kitty. I have loved living on my own, but it has definitely been an adjustment. I DO get my "me" time but a lot of my "me" time is spent doing the things that my Mom used to take care of for me :) So it's just getting used to the change.

My passion has been... growing. Each and every situation life takes me through refines me and teaches me that God can only use me--Taryn--in a special, unique way. This way is apart from anyone else's way. That, to me, is a beautiful thought. With that in mind, I am trying to stay as plugged in as possible to the Lord's plan in using my talents and personality to bless others. Without that, what am I really living for? Myself?

Attitude is so important, I am finding. I love that quote that says, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." It's so true. Not that "happiness" is our ultime goal, but the point is, WE are in charge of how we let certain situations, words, thoughts, emotions, or anything else affect us. I can either choose to let something destroy me, or teach me. I can let it tear me down, or make me stronger. I can let it kill my mood, or make me thankful. I can choose to become irritated, or smile my way through. I can let all the little things bring me down, or let the One I DO have lift me up.

It's all a perspective check, really. And it's all in having an attitude of gratitude.

I'm just thankful for a Jesus who is so patient and kind!

Love you all,

T

I have less than 5 minutes to write this.

Lucky you.

Tomorrow, we have a wedding. Will be our first HOT one.

This Sunday is Father's day... and my parents will be gone. :(

I have lots of little updates and some new insights, but there is just not enough time to fill you in on everything tonight.

So we'll just review a few fun facts:

1) My new morning routine is as follows:
Get out of bed.
(And because the mornings have actually been DELIGHTFULLY cool...)
Wrap myself in my hot pink soft blanket.
Fix a bowl of cereal.
Go outside.
Sit on the little lawn chair in my backyard with my face completely basking in the sun.
(But my body is wrapped up and warm in my blanket, of course.)
Eat my bowl of cereal.
Read Jesus Calling.
Pray.
Obtain Vitamin D and needed sun-on-face for 5 minutes.
Go inside and get ready for the day.

This routine has had amazing results! It could just be in my head, but I feel more joyful and ready to tackle my day when started this way.

2) Ever since I started making stovetop popcorn with extra virgin olive oil & a dash of Morton Salt, I have had a very difficult time returning to microwave popcorn.

It's just not the same.

3) My favorite afternoon pick-me-up snack at work is a small cup of the flavor-of-the-day coffee from L&B (my fave is Snickerdoodle) & a chocolate Hershey's bar.

That's all for tonight... we'll talk soon.

Love you all,

T